He tried to gather up the courage to end everything once and for all, but he was too afraid, thinking that if he survived he might remain paralyzed, trapped in his body forever. Standing on the edge of the cliff, he thought of all the people who loved him, and he thought of death. He got to the edge of a cliff, and was one step away from ending all his pain and suffering. He felt that living brought too much pain, and the only way not to feel the pain was to end his life. Everything he felt, everything he saw only made him more and more depressed. He was scared because he did not know what was going on inside his mind.Īfter three days with no sleep and food, he could no longer withstand the pain he was feeling.

The impression of a dark cloud that poured endless rain over him made him feel 'caved in', with no way of escaping.

He was 24 at the time, and with little or no understanding of depression, or awareness of it. One day, in September of 1999, Matt Haig felt that his old self had died. The novel was reviewed by The Sunday Times, The Daily Telegraph, The Guardian, the Star Tribune, and the Toronto Star. It is Matt Haig’s first nonfiction piece and the first time he wrote about his illness publicly. It is based on his experiences of living with depression and anxiety disorder, which he suffered from the age of 24. Reasons to Stay Alive is a novel and memoir written by novelist Matt Haig, published on 5 March 2015.

Reasons to Stay Alive by Matt Haig